Blog
Consent Is Play
Consent IS sexy, because it creates connection and intimacy. Unfortunately, we are often taught to think of consent as a set of rules and regulations we must follow if we don’t want to get in trouble, but that’s a terrible way to teach and think about it. The truth is that asking for and giving consent creates an opportunity for both people to speak their needs and preferences, and to feel seen.
Let’s Talk About Seduction
Seductiveness is a perception that exists in the perceiver. One person might be turned on by a bikini, another by someone in a headscarf, another by a bare foot. What arouses us is based on our own private history, our own personal set of associations. How then could we possibly blame someone else for our desires?
A Doctor’s Note
When I was a teenager, my mother and stepfather became obsessed with my virginity. I was sexually abused as a child, so I hadn’t been a virgin for a long time, but no one wanted to talk about that. They wanted to talk instead about the boys they insisted I flirted with — most of all, Reza — all of whom I’d done absolutely nothing with. But my parents’ suspicions only increased.
