The Mind Is Like a Desk With Many Drawers

Painting by Rene Magritte

The other day, I bought a dress I was really excited about. But when I came home, I couldn’t imagine ever wearing something so old-fashioned. Still, I knew I had been in love with the dress back in the dressing room, so I decided not to return it, in case I rediscover my original excitement.

The mind has many compartments for storing memories and wishes — just as a desk has many drawers for storing papers and files. Some of the mind’s compartments are locked and some are wide open. Some are stuck and open only with difficulty. 

Sometimes we put a memory or wish in one compartment and then can’t remember, or can’t relate to, what we put there. Having lots of drawers and not being able to find something right away doesn’t make us crazy. We lock things away for a very good reason: our lives would be a total mess if everything were “out” at once. Not everything can be examined all the time.

A few years ago, a very strong resentment toward a close family member started to surface. I kept asking myself, “Why am I feeling this only now?” The truth was that, for years, it wasn’t safe to have those feelings, so my mind simply wouldn’t let me go there. 

If you are having trouble remembering important events, it’s not because your mind is broken. It’s because your mind is protecting itself from what would happen if those memories were released. If you have more compartments, it’s because your mind needed to expand in order to survive. And if you start getting a flood of recovered memories, it’s because you and your mind are ready for them.

In no case is anything wrong with you. Your mind simply knows when it’s safe to remember and when it isn’t.